Once upon a time on the Bioware Social Network there was a group and in that group a few people got together to write a story one word at a time, post by post. This is how that story went…
Warning: THIS IS NOT FOR ANYONE REMOTELY SANE.
One day Commander Shepard was shooting at talimancers with a toaster until TIM took the cigarette off the talimancers faces causing an extreme gangbang. Kelly joined eagerly with a special dildo that was filled with lots of heavy liquid that when the jelly exploded on everyone.
Jacob then had decided to help Legion procreate with EDI. Udina sucked a geth carrying babies. Legion experienced pleasure by dancing on Tali’s poopsacks. Grunt laughed. Joker leaped with super limping joy. Meanwhile, Miranda dangled her suit over Shepard’s fish stick.
EDI watched Grunt taste Garrus’s vine scented lovestick beside Kelly. She was watching the Commander dance naked with Miranda, which resembled turkeys mating. Grunt laughed. Unicorns pranced merrily above Jack who began singing lovely bunch of coconuts at Mordins jacket. Meanwhile Grunt got high. Miranda stripped again in Reed’s-room.
Liara was playing with Nintendo 64 unconventually. She was using a gamepad.
Shepard launched a misslie at Velarn. Jack got a boner from watching teletubies. Later that evening poop was falling out of Jacob’s ass. It was the night when everyone was having Kelly’s pie. Garrus was kissing Kelly, but she came early so Garrus couldnt resist to rip a hole in her shirt so he grabbed her breasts and squeezed his cannon ball, until Vin Disel interrupted him by giving a lolipop to Kelly Rippa. Yeoman put in a bannana. This turned out to be a giraffe with huge nipples. Thane likes huge waffles covered with syrup.
Then, suddenly God slapped some hanar balls because Blasto ate God’s caviare cockring. After killing all Taliban horses, they focused on stopping the powerful brood. Later in Queens, shit was happening. The palmtree died. Flaming Cowboys smoked biscuits with radioactive butter. Cows shat beer. Tali-broodmother is birthing moar DarkTaliban broodlings. Armageddon ensued.
Yeah this just happened and I have no idea why ._.
Back to normal now however.
In other news I’m combing through the earlier chapters in Children of the Stars, I’m thankful it was only in the first few or so that Keleria used contractions. Seems weird for her to talk like that now that I’m so comfortable with her totally avoiding contractions in the first place.
Dude, I’m pretty sure this isn’t professional…it’s the middle of winter. Please put some clothes on.
I’d like to know how Amazon made the connection from sour candy to…that.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who read that in GLaDOS voice…
But seriously if this is the first thing you make you think twice about buying Proactiv, I’m sorry.
It’s just a shitty product all around. u_u
i’m covered in zits and so is my bf :3c
………i cant believe this is real
If your advertising campaign reminds people of a homicidal robot you’re doing it terribly wrong.
There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to. I invited your best friend, the Companion Cube. Of course, he couldn’t come because you murdered him. All your other friends couldn’t come, either, because you don’t have any other friends because of how unlikable and acne ridden you are. It says so right here in your personnel file: “Unlikable and acne ridden. Liked by no one. A bitter, unlikable loner, whose passing shall not be mourned. Shall NOT be mourned. Also, completely covered in terrible acne.” That’s exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official. It also says you were adopted, so that’s funny, too.
this fucking thread
Excuse me whilst I unfuse my palm and my face…
As hilarious as I find all the comments - reminded me of Glados too - WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?
I used to have terrible problems with acne, this is a really shitty way to advertise a product. Was it made by the same guys who made the “Cheat on your girlfriend, not your workout” ad?
Also, dudes have acne as well, so they’re really quite obviously going for needling insecure young girls. How desperate do you have to be to sell an already shitty product that you have to stab the insecurity of a teenager to sell it?
I’m not even a huge Harry Potter fan, read the first book, seen a few of the movies and I’m still aware of how monumentally better it is than Twilight.
But then, most things are better than Twilight.
Did anyone cringe each time they misspelled something? I misspell and misplace words because my fingers are trying to keep up with my head on the keyboard. Typing “2” in the place of “to” is intentional. Just…argh, all of this is terrible.