“I am too young to feel this old,” Ashira muttered, accepting the glass of whiskey from Garrus. He poured himself some Turian brandy, reclining into the chair next to her. They were looking out over the presidium in the same spot they’d shot the bottles during the War.

“New candidates just keep pouring in huh?”

“I’m just glad there’s enough of us left to split up into specialized testing. Bau takes up sniping and infiltration, I put them through assault and demolition-“

“And Samara scares the hell out of them with biotic testing?”

Ashira shot him a wry look and his mandibles flared in a grin, “yes, actually.”

Garrus chuckled, drinking some of his brandy, “so how long before you suggest her joining the Spectres?”

She shook her head, “well done, detective Vakarian.”

He gave a half-assed bow from his relaxed position, “I do try.”

Ashira smirked, downing some of her whiskey, “not sure how I’ll word it.”

“Blunt truth isn’t cutting it?”

“I don’t know, I feel like I’ll be opening a floodgate.”

“Like things are going to escalate and get dangerous?”

“It’s a really stupid thought, I know she can take care of herself. I know that.”

Garrus was quiet a moment, mandibles pulled tightly against his jaw, “yeah, well we’ve seen a lot of good people go down before.”

Ashira tried to find a smile somewhere but couldn’t muster the energy, suddenly lacking it. She sighed and took a larger mouthful of her drink, “do you think about them, Garrus?”

His response was quiet but immediate, “every night.”

She forced a smile and reached over, patting his shoulder, “bet they’re cheering down at us.”

Garrus nodded, “can’t imagine what the reunion with Anderson and Udina looked like.”

A single breath escaped her throat, almost a laugh but failing as it passed her lips, “not friendly.”

He took another swig, his glass half empty now, “maybe Ashley was there to welcome him too.”

Ashira closed her eyes, leaning her head back and just listening to sky cars below, “that would’ve been funny.”

They both went quiet, Garrus watching the pretend sky and Ashira almost falling asleep. The glasses were refilled but few words were exchanged until the bottles were almost empty and the silent veil of stoicism crumbled.

Garrus idly waved his hand, poking Ashira’s shoulder when it wandered close enough to the woman, “now you, you were always so crazy. I stood there for half the missions thinking to myself ‘oh, so this is how I’m going to die.’ You do realize that right?”

Ashira grinned, eyes still shut, “yeah and I wondered how many times I could pull this shit off before someone mutinied.” She turned her head to look at him, “glad I had other crazy people with me.”

He chuckled, snorting a bit, “gotta be a bit crazy to run with the Shepard.”

She scoffed, “the Shepard. I sound like I should have a damn cape.”

“Why not? It’d make you look so stylish.”

“I could be space Batwoman.”

“I have no idea who that is, but that sounds perfect. You should really do that.”

“I’ll put it on my to-do-list. Maybe for Halloween?”

“Hallowha…?”

“Human holiday, we put costumes on and hunt for candy.”

“Why are you all so weird?”

“I dunno, why do you have a scaly face.”

“Because you had to have those creepy stringy things on your head.”

“My stringy things are amazing.”

They broke out in a fit of giggles, hardly noticing the approaching footsteps.

“You two are hopeless,” Liara spoke under her breath, smiling and watching the pair laugh in a drunken haze. She’d leave them a little longer before she coaxed them into the car so she could take them home.

I’m enjoying the plot getting picked apart, it’s nearly 3am and I’m fairly chilled…

SUDDENLY CUTS TO SAMARA SHOOTING HERSELF WITH NO WARNING WHAT SO EVER.

Any of you paying attention to my weird little corner of the internet may remember I was trying to write a oneshot set during my post-ME3 headcanon called “Close to Home” and the main point of it was my space-born Shep’s mother meets Samara.

Now I do have an idea of how Samara should act during this exchange [read: super stiff and formal because this is Shepard’s mother. Shepard’s mother.], I know how Ashira (my shepard) will act and I know how Hannah Shepard will act.

But for the life of me I cannot churn out this dialogue as easily as I thought I would. I figured I would write the dialogue and then just fill in the scene around it, I’ve done this before, it’s worked for me, yet this dialogue just does not want to get written. I am going to lazily blame this on the fact that I have never had a girlfriend myself and thus have never had this kind of interaction. I also don’t recall having watched this kind of interaction in a show, video game, film or read it in a book.

I have considered asking my mother for help, like what would she say in the situation and I might just to look at that as another option anyway but uh…here’s what I have so far -

Hannah: “Ashira!”

Ashira: “How do you get the same table every time?”

Hannah: “I think the family name helps.”

Ashira: “I’ll bet.”

Samara: “Rear Admiral Shepard, it’s a pleasure.”

Hannah: “Please, call me Hannah. You’re Samara, yes? I almost expected Ash to stall this.”

Ashira: “Mother.”

Hannah: “You know I’m joking. So I suppose it would be a little pointless to ask how you met? Or is it not that obvious?”

Ashira: “Well I was actually looking to recruit Samara on Illium and an Eclipse merc went flying by my head…”

Samara: “I was working.”

Ashira: “True, but even with the interruption you went straight to business.”

Hannah: “So not your conventional meeting, but I expected that.”

“Dayyum shame. I’d totally motorboat that blue milf tits.”

For the more excitable of us it’s seeing ^THIS^ countless times.

And repressing this —V